Are you one of those people who likes To Do lists? When we’re busy it sometimes helps to write down all the things that have to be done that day, that week, whenever…
Sometimes it feels like life is a never-ending list of chores. I’ve spoken before about all the different responsibilities we take on in life and the choices that we make. But when you’re faced with a long list on paper or in your head how do you prioritise which to do first?
There are of course the big tasks the ones that take a lot of management and sorting when you probably need help, planning and lots of organisation. Really a multitude of jobs put together. Then there’s the little ones – the quick ticks on that To Do list.
I’ve never been a great one for unnecessary housework but faced with a daunting essay in my second year at University, I remember setting about cleaning the admittedly filthy communal parts in the house I was sharing when I returned early from the Christmas holidays – to the surprise of my fellow students coming back the next week. The essay got done eventually but it wasn’t very good… Yet in the present day whilst I have several (expensive) plumbing, gardening and other problems in my house to sort, amongst other things, writing this blog seems far more appealing right now!
There’s always the pull between work-family-social and similar conundrums. Which do you prioritise and when? Getting the balance right is a lifelong challenge.
I’ve just been reading Hamnet, the tragic semi-fictional story about Shakespeare’s son who died at just 11 years old whilst the Bard was heading back to Stratford from London – where his work drew him constantly. His name and prodigious work will forever remain etched in world literature, but would it have been the same if he’d spent more time at home with his family?
Sometimes we choose to do one thing rather than another, because it’s just too challenging to tackle the elephant in the room. The hilarious TV series ‘Avoidance’ focuses on the leading protagonist’s lack of courage in dealing with his marital relationship and finding other things to distract him. Interestingly my counsellor says I have a similar tendency to avoid tough choices.
Our priorities sometimes reflect our values. I was recently turned down, to my dismay, for a fabulous acting role, largely because I had committed to another project which overlapped too much in the director’s view. It was similar when I was employed full time; tempting offers to work elsewhere came and went. It may have been loyalty, but back then inertia, fear of the unknown or some other factor might also have stopped me. It’s difficult to unpick, looking back.
At any one time we choose to prioritise one thing against another. My otherwise excellent economics teacher at Raynes Park High memorably gave us the example of stopping for another drink against missing the last bus home as an entirely rational economic choice – although from my own subsequent experience alcohol rarely improves your decision making.
For years I have given quite a high priority to my voluntary work with Wimblecomm. But what makes me and us, as trustees, continue to commit to this when there are other calls on our time?
One thing I have discovered over the years is that people (and I include myself) can sometimes turn their distractions to pastimes, the pastimes to obsessions, the obsessions to addictions. I can say, I think, with some confidence that writing this weekly blog and supporting this charity isn’t an addiction. I think. But it has become something I have determined to do, for good or ill. Next time I’m going to start examining the darker side of some of our contemporary addictions.